Sunday, July 15, 2007

HAIRSTORY

My hairstory is similar to so many of the other stories that I have read fromt his wonderful group. I too, spent many a Saturday sitting in the kitchen while my Mother pressed my hair--exhaust fans, grease, burnt ears, that smell.....
I got my first relaxer the summer before my senior year--just in time for senior pictures. I thought I was hot stuff. Problem was, my Mother, bless her heart, couldn't stand the idea of paying someone $30 or $40 dollars every couple weeks to do what she felt she could do herself. Consequently I probably didn't go back to the hairdresser for almost a year, and by the time that I did, I had so many split ends that she just picked up the scissors and started cutting. I didn't mind that so much, but my Mother was furioius. She always wanted me to have long hair, like my sister.
But I got the short hair gene--like herself. I think her reaction to me was a little based on her image of herself--I look like her, have her hair. Don't think she liked that very much. Anway, my hair never grew passed my ears. And I was OK with that. I just thought--that's how it is, and that's how its gonna be.
I found someone to do my hair in college pretty cheap, so I went frequently--and I had the time to take care of it when I couldn't go. I liked how I looked with short hair.

Fast forward to getting married, and having a baby, my son--December 1997. I was on a very limited budget at that time, and my hair suffered. I got my first braided extensions soon after my second child, my daughter, was born. Looked OK, but I was never quite comfortable with suddenly having shoulder length hair. Just seemed kind of fake, and I felt like everyone who looked at me knew it.

I took the braids out, and made my way to the hairdresser for my next relaxer. This was October, 2000. The lady behind the chair had a beautiful textured natural. I remember telling her, "I wish I was brave enought to wear my hair like yours." Her reply was,"why don't you?" So, sitting in the chair, I decided, why not??--and she proceeded with the big chop. I really liked how I looked with my little fro--it was actually rather liberating. I was terribly nervous about going home, because I knew my husband was NOT going to be happy. Sure enough, I walked in the door, and his reaction was "What the h___ did you do to your hair??"

I wore my hair in various lenghts of a fro for the next five years. Sometimes natural, sometimes with a texturizer. Then I started getting restless. I decided to start trying some new looks. Bought a couple of wigs.

Got the corn rolls that made me look like I had plastic surgery, and caused bumps along my hairline.

Got my first sew-in weave. Let me tell you--this was THE WORST.
I had a picture of this cute, short curly style--I got this Chaka Khan (Love you Chaka), shoulder length thing. The beautician told me not to worry that the style was so far from the picture. She had been doing weaves for years, and knew what was best for my face and head. NOT!!! I left there physically in shock--my head hurt so bad, that I had to lay my head down in the passenger seat at every light. Once the pain ended, the itching started. By the time I took the weave out, I had pulled out two patches of hair on the top of my head. I said NEVER AGAIN.


I noticed in some of the posts--many of your had become frustrated with your natural styles, and either had, or were about to go back to relaxers. By this summer, I was acutally thinking of that myself. Being natural, didn't seem to be doing much more for my hair.... I thought well, maybe if I make sure I get it done regularly, the relaxer will be a good thing this time.


I consider myself a spiritual person. And I definitely know that God provides exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. My parents were vending jewelry for my sister at a Women's empowerment event in June 2007. Next to their table was a sister promoting Sisterlocks. My Mother took the information, and gave it to me. I spent the next two days reading websits and blogs, and absolutely loved what I saw.

I called on a Sunday, and scheduled my consultation for the next day. And here I am...

I think Sisterlocks really fits the type of life that I am trying to lead. I am trying to move past negativity, hurt, and pain that has plagued me for much of my life. Sometimes I think that I am this free-spirit, artistic, bold person trapped in this corporate, suburban,stressed out body and life. I think having Sisterlocs will be one way to let my true inner voice be heard.


(Sorry this was so long--forgive me for rambling...I'm just happy to be here.)

5 comments:

Ms Stella said...

I enjoyed reading your hairstory. I have experienced many of the things you mentioned.

With Sisterlocks, the next chapter of your story will be so wonderful.

I will be back to check on your progress.

Valenciajaz said...

I enjoyed reading your testimony. Sista, I'm want to testify to you that having Sisterlocks has been liberating physically, mentally, and spiritually. I marvel at the way that God has given us a hair texture YOUNIQUE to the person he gives it to. I've had Sisterlocks for 16 months and everyday with them is sweeter than the day b4. When you get your install please share your journey so that those who're searching will have another testimony of how Godly natural hair is.

PAYLAR said...

Thank you for your support ladies. I honoured to be part of such a beautiful group!!

blackrussian said...

Welcome to the family.

I will be planning a SL Gathering for the ATL in the next month or so, you might want to check my blog for details. (Forthcoming.)

I was inspired by the ladies of DFW and think it would be nice for those of us in this area to get together 1 or 2 times a year.

I am adding you to my blogroll.

If you visit my blog, you will see how long I can write at a time, so don't worry about long entries. It's how we learn what's on your mind and get to understand your history and experiences.

blackrussian said...

First time I visited, I scanned. THIS TIME I read.

Don't take this the wrong way: I mean it as positively as possible...

THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE SHORT HAIR GENE...

Just hair that is too fragile to stand up to the demands that we put on it with heat styling and chemicals.

And this is not even unique to black women. I have friends who are white and hispanic who have hair that 'won't grow' past a certain length that they consider short, and I know it is because they bleach it or perm it or straighten it or fry it.

Not everyon's hair grows at the same rate, obviously, and this also accounts for 'hair that won't grow.' If you are losing hair due to damage faster than it grows in, of course it seems like you are doomed to have short hair forever.

Once you start wearing your SLs you will have more length and thickness and options for styling than you EVER thought possible.

But, of course you knew this already...

Who am I tellin'?

I am SO GLAD you discovered SLs before you went back to the relaxer!!!

You will be amazed by the other lifestyle changes that sisterlocks encourage you to make.